How To Irritate Your Boy in Ten Easy Steps

1. Go to store (any store with clothing will suffice). 
2. Hand him a pair of shorts/pants in size 8 and have him pull them on.  This will require him to remove his sneakers from his unsocked feet (which makes the foot sweatier and thereby less cooperative).
3. Tell him to yank those pants off and try on the size 10 pants.  Turn him around and around so you can see if "there's room to grow."
4. Have him try on the size 8 pants again.  Tug at the waist some and instruct him to button and unbutton the pants several times to see how uncooperative the buttonhole is (you really only have his best interests at heart here, since emergency bathroom trips + uncooperative buttonhole = accidents).
5. Decide that you don't like any of these pants and head to another store, all the while promising your boy that "yes, we're almost done."
6. Rinse and repeat the above 5 steps except find a pair that you do like but the store only has one in his size.
7. Pack boy into car and head to same store but on the other side of town with a cheerful "yes, we can go home after this."
8. Rinse and repeat the first four steps just to make sure someone's not gypping you out of $9.99 per pant.
9. Tell your boy that since he's been fairly patient, he can look at snazzy sneakers that will make him run faster and jump farther than anyone else on the planet.
10. Don't buy the sneakers because they are such a gyp.

And there you have it!