A Block of Wood, Paint and Wheels...big deal

Andy joined Cub Scouts this year, as a Tiger Scout.  Considering our den and pack at his school is brand spankin' new and apparently nobody knows what they're doing, it has been fabulous and I've been impressed with the program.  You may think I'm criticizing here, but let me give you an excerpt of my conversation with the packmaster:

Me:  "Hey, John, so when we do this derby, are we supposed to..."
Packmaster cuts me off by waving his hands in the air:  "Kristin, you and everyone else keeps assuming I know something about Cub Scouts.  I know nothing."

This was in January so we had already been in scouts for a few months.  The fact that the packmaster, after hosting 3 pretty cool pack meetings, was still saying he didn't know squat should tell you that we've been flying by the seat of our pants.

So this whole pinewood derby came up.  I won't go into details about how I forgot to say no when the packmaster said "hey, could you find us a track?" and I won't tell you about how I tracked down a dude named Ed who clearly didn't want to talk to a woman about boy scouts and pinewood derbys.  I will tell you that after I bullied another den dad to call Ed and work it all out, that the den dad agreed that Ed was a guy's guy and I was right all along. 

When we were handed our kits a month ago, I determined that this was, indeed, something a dad should do with his son.  And I told Kevin that.  And he agreed.  In in the spirit of keeping Kevin on target, I arranged for the boys to go over to my stepdad's tools and carve a couple pieces of wood.

I sat there impatiently while Kevin and Stan discussed body types and looked things up on the internet.  And then they shuffled out to the garage.  And then came back in.  Talked about not having the right kind of saw or something.  All I remember was slightly losing my patience and jumping in the car to go to McDonalds.  Because seriously?  It was a block of wood. 

A block of wood.  Paint and wheels.  What was there to debate?  Just saw off a few things and round it off and that's a car, right?

Yeah, apparently not.  APPARENTLY, in the guy world, the Pinewood Derby is about more than just a block of wood.  It's a freakin' work of art and design and speed.  And did I get lectured by no fewer than 5 different male individuals who politely told me to back away from the block of wood.

Which I did.

The final product.  The Batmobile.  It's just a block of wood, paint and wheels. 

Or is it?

After Andy's car won Fastest Car in the Tiger Den and also Fastest Car in the Pack, I was approached by three dads.

"You're his mom?"  They inquired, pointing not to my son, but to the Batmobile that one of them was holding.

I fessed up that yes, indeed, I was the mother of that car.

"What did you do to this car?"  They were turning it upside down and looking at it from all angles.

"Um, melted lead.  Graphite.  Something done to the nails."  My detailed response.

But they had done that too, they argued.  They asked how deep we drilled and poured in the lead.  I answered the best I could.  I don't think they thought I was hiding trade secrets or anything; I'm pretty sure they viewed me as a Girl or worse, a Mom of a Boy Who Doesn't Know Squat About Cars.  Boy, were they dead on.  I think what sealed the deal was when I said "Guys, it's a block of wood, paint and wheels.  That's all I know." 

Heads were shook.  Disappointment that the Dad was MIA (baseball) reigned supreme. 

But it was the most awesome day for those boys.  Every kid got a certificate and even the kid who got "Most Fuel Efficient Car" was jumping for joy.  Not one boy cried, not one boy said "that's not fair" and not one boy decked another boy for saying his car was slow. 

I'm gonna like this Cub Scouts thing.