Mr. Strong Willed Boy Goes To Church

"Paul, do you think you can be a big boy and we can sit with Daddy and Rachel and Andy in the big church?"

He nods solomnly.  "Yes, Momma.  Sit in big chuch wif Daddy."

"And we have to be quiet, right?  And use our whisper voices, right?"

He nods again.  And whispers, "Yes, our whisser boices."

So we grab a pew 5 rows from the back.  Because I may be hopeful but dumb I am not. 

And we get through a song or two and then sit down for the first reading.  Paul's sitting nicely and he opens up his backpack to pull out his Power Rangers.  He gets all  6 of them out on his lap. 

Then, they started battling.  At first it was a non-verbal battle.  You know, the kind that only involves super kicks and super slams against each other.  But before the first reading was done, the Power Rangers had had enough of silently duking it out.

"Pshhh.  Pkwaah. Pkwaah.  Pfffffffgh."

I squeezed my eyes shut and hoped it stayed as small talk. 

No such luck.

"Pffwa!  Pchaa!  Pwow!"

I leaned over.  "Shh, Paul.  Shh.  Remember, use your whisper voice."

His face scrunched up.  "No, Mommy."

"Yes, whisper voice."

Apparently, I'm a doofus because the child put his Power Rangers down, reached up with one hand to turn my face toward him and in his best non-whisper voice said "No.  I say no, Mommy."

Power Rangers + church = non-whispering.  Oh, I get it now.