Playdate Contract

Dearest Amy, I laughed and laughed and laughed at my surprise snail-mail. You were right. It is something I would write. I couldn't find a link to it on their website, so sadly I had to edit it below.

An excerpt from the Standard Contract for Playdate Services, as found in the October issue of Cookie Magazine:

"This agreement is entered into by and between HOST and GUEST's parents who agree to the following terms:

Services Provided:
Playing is defined as two or more children frolicking, laughing, gamboling, romping, cavorting or otherwise engaging in activities deemed fun or enjoyable by or for children. Said activities need not be educational and in fact are likely to involve minimal supervision from HOST.

Services Not Provided:
Disciplining beyond 'Settle Down'; i.e. host will not be expected to yell, threaten, punish or in any way control out-of-control behavior of GUEST. If GUEST does behave in a manner that would invite such discipline, HOST is permitted to call GUEST's parents and exclaim 'Oh. My. God. Your kid is possessed. Get him out of my house.' If GUEST's parents do not answer the phone, HOST is authorized to place GUEST out on back porch until the time GUEST's parents arrives. HOST will not be responsible for colds, insect stings, animal bites or pants peeing that may ensue during porch sitting.

Feeding GUEST any food other than what is stocked in a reasonable human's kitchen. HOST will not be required to provide anything vegetarian, organic or lacto-ovo. If GUEST eats more than a normal school-age child can consume, defined as less than or equal to seven Eggos, a pound and a half of pasta, 14 string cheeses or nine clementines, then GUEST's parent will be responsible for reimbursement of said items to HOST.

Terms of Renegotiation:
Future playdates may be renegotiated based on HOST's subjective experience of having GUEST in HOST's home. Such renegotiations may result in a complete barring of any future playdates, regardless of children's undying professions of best-friend status. HOST may explain in terms including but not limited to, 'We're just so busy.' GUEST's parents should interpret this to mean, 'I can't explain it, but I really don't like your kid.'"