Parenting Adventures

I have this friend named "Colleen" (names have been changed to protect the sort-of innocent). And Colleen has a 15 year old daughter named "Tanya" who is a freshman in high school.

One day last week, Colleen picked up Tanya from school and headed home. At some point on the road, Tanya reached down to her Powerpuff Girl backpack and pulled out several sheets of paper.

"Oh look at me being all sneaky," Tanya said. When her mother gave her a questioning look, Tanya continued on. "All sneaky because I have a copy of the test for my Agriculture 1 class."

Colleen frowned, attempting to determine if her child was pulling her leg or not. "And how and why would you have something like this?"

"Someone got a copy for me." This was Tanya's nonchalant response.

"Seriously?"

"Yup, look."

Colleen looked and sure enough, it looked like a test. As her face morphed into a bizzare replica of a medieval gargoyle, Tanya blurted out "But Mom, it's not like it has the answers on it or anything."

"That is cheating, Tanya. You know this, right? Answers or no, having a copy of the test ahead of time is cheating. Like the kind of cheating you could get kicked out for."

Tanya huffed a "fine" and thrust the test at her mom.

Colleen's face slowly morphed back to normal.

Since that day, "Colleen" and I have had a few talks and discussions and ponderings about this little event. Her daughter is a good kid overall and a rather smart kid. She doesn't make the best of grades, but she's not a loser kid by any stretch of the imagination. So what did this little event mean overall?

Has "Colleen" failed as a parent to instill that line between right and wrong? Does "Tanya" really understand that difference of what is good and acceptable and what is not? Is it too late if she doesn't get it? If the girl is willing to cheat on a test like this, what does that indicate about the rest of her life options?

After much mulling over coffee and Easter candy, "Colleen" and I came to a conclusion. We decided her daughter does indeed know the line between right and wrong, because the girl pulled out the test and showed her mother. She's not a stupid kid; there's no way she really thought her mother would high-five her or ignore it. Perhaps she was just testing the waters to see if the line was indeed where she thought it was and wanted to confirm this with her mother. If she was really a cheater, she wouldn't have shared this little tidbit with her mom.

Right?