Nitpicking on Kids Shows

This post is for Heather, who introduced me a couple years ago to the brand new show, The Backyardigans. I know a few other parents who spend endless hours trying to ignore the sounds of preschool television will see the humor in the following blog, but it will be Heather that will appreciate it most (since she and I spent a good hour+ one afternoon discussing Disney's apparent issues with motherhood, since all of the Princesses throughout Disney's career have no mothers whatsoever).

I'm not trying to be a crazy evangelical preacher here, denouncing preschool television as Satan's will (like the Care Bears and Teletubbies). But since I am going through Round 3 of daytime kiddo shows with Paul, I have found myself nitpicking on just about every show out there...to the point of unnatural obsession. Not healthy at all. But I feel I should share my findings...

"Thomas the Train" - really, nothing is wrong with this show. It has good moral endings, catchy little phrases ("cinders and ashes" and "you have caused confusion and delay") and healthy friendships between all types of trains. But have you ever compared the actual map of the island of Sodor to the many, many shows? For an island, there sure is an awful lot of mountains, rivers, viaducts, beaches, tracks, loading docks, castles, and so forth. It's an island, for crying out loud.

"Little Bear" - again, a basically healthy show consisting of a bear with a mom and a dad. But has anyone noticed that while Mom and Dad are fully dressed, Little Bear runs around with nothing on? Nothing but fur, that is?

"Oswald" - an odd little show involving an octopus and a penguin that live in the same apartment building in Big City. They're closest friend is a yellow daisy named Daisy. Oswald the octopus has a pet weenie dog. It's definitely imaginative and overall, a good little show. But, I've noticed that the writers of this show ignore certain things like the fact that everytime Oswald crosses the street, he looks right, left, and then right (you're supposed to look left, right, left since traffic would hit you from the left first). There was also an episode where Oswald made a birthday cake in the bathtub, borrowing Daisy's unicycle (fresh off the street) to mix it up. Not too sure how I feel about that.

"Yo Gabba Gabba" - I simply don't understand it. It's that simple. Apparently, kids are drawn to this show like flies to my kitchen. I think the basic principle is a guy named DJ Lance has some "dolls" that he imagines into life and then they play and act out life lessons, like eating all your food. But one of the "dolls" is a bumpy, one eyed creature that is just plain scary. And when you put all 5 of these "dolls" together, they are straight out of a nightmare.

"Dora the Explorer" - um, where the heck are Dora's parents and why is she allowed to run all over the planet? I realize she's got her trusty monkey, Boots, for protection, but still. That kid goes well beyond her backyard.

"The Wonder Pets" - three small animals (a turtle, a guinea pig and a duckling) save various animals in the outside world with teamwork. And by escaping the classroom via a cubby. I actually don't have many problems with this one except that these little animals sing just about everything rather than talking. It gets annoying, trust me.


"Wow Wow Wubzy" - I've noticed that when Wubzy does naughty things, like taking his friend's delivery package, opening it up, playing with the toy train and practically destroying it - all without his friend's knowledge - he doesn't seem to face any consequences.

"Max & Ruby" - a brother and sister bunny who, I suppose, are meant to act out the life of siblings. You know, younger brother, Max, gets into minor scraps or doesn't understand and his older sister, Ruby, shows him the way. However, if you watch enough of this show, that Ruby is a mean little girl - she orders her little brother around right and left and totally never lets him do what he wants to do. Just the way she talks to him, all condescending and self-righteous. Maybe that is the way it is with siblings, but I would think the show would want to teach a better way to handle your little brother.


"Higglytown Heros" - this one took a while for me to warm up to because gosh dern it, those kids are whiny. I completely support the idea that everyone can be a here in his/her job in the community. And it's neat that the kids know that they can call on help when needed, like perhaps building a clubhouse involving hammers and nails (see, good lesson for the kiddos - don't play with tools). But when the Higglytown kids can't make it through a game of hopscotch without calling in a referee, there are problems. Whatever happened to solving some problems on your own, getting creative or working together to figure out a solution? Seriously, when the marker lands on the line in between the 2 and the 3 on the hopscotch board, is that a reason to call in a referee? They can't figure that one out themselves?


This has gone on long enough (the blog, not the shows), but I feel like I need to at least share the one show I've found to possibly be the best kiddo show out there (and naturally, my kids are only lukewarm toward it) - "The Backyardigans". It is completely about the power of imagination, interactive play, being outside, solving problems, getting along with friends (and not all 5 friends are in each episode) and they never leave the backyard!